Don’t Miss Grow month where you can apply easy ways to instantly grow your connection with others. Because we all want to feel and be connected!


Dear Reader, I used to think that as I got older it would not only be easier to remain connected with those close to me but it would also be easier to connect with new friends. That proved to be more difficult than I thought. Then I developed the question I am sharing with you this week.

Do you ever struggle with feeling real connection with others? Did you know that 40% of people don’t feel connected? –40%! and that’s a “fair to low” estimate based on the several research articles I found through Fortune, AARP, Harvard Medical Review, and Forbes.  Whether the problem of connection is internal or external, that’s a large amount of people! People like you and me with daily struggles, wisdom to share, skills to offer, and hugs to give. That’s why this month I’m jumping on the multiple writings already out there bemoaning our little connections and offering simple yet powerful ways to help grow our connections with one another. This week I give you a simple question that can be like Miracle-Gro for your connections.

Let me share this week’s question and then we can walk through a suggested way to implement your answers with intentional actions.

Here’s the question: What do I need in my day to help me be the best me? Or another version: What do I include each day that will allow me to be the best version of myself?

Simple enough question, huh?

The challenge comes when you bring it to reality.

Before we get to the intentional implementation, your first next step is to reflect on the question. Yes, reflection to help us assess your current strengths and your future potential. I’ve included a free worksheet for you to download to help with the reflection. real connections worksheet

  1. Start by describing times when others said they saw you be the best you or shared they thought you were showing the best version of yourself.
  2. Next list out the actions or habits that were in those times you could replicate.
  3. Now take the opposite viewpoint and list out the things that tend to either smother or steal your energy to be the best you or the best version of yourself.
  4. To help you with increasing the specifics, now begin to think about the 5 areas of intimacy and then list at least 1 action or habit that helps in each intimacy area.
    1. Spiritual
    2. Emotional
    3. Intellectual
    4. Physical
    5. Relational


Now let’s talk through doing just that, implementing the actions and habits into a daily rhythm.

  1. Next add in timing for each (how often/frequency or how much/an amount of time), you have seen is best for each of the actions or habits that help you be the best you or the best version of you.
  2. Lastly take those minimum of 5 actions or habits from the areas of intimacy along with the actions or habits you currently have in your day that help you be the best you and give them a certain day or time of day.
  3. Action Step – fill in the blank with the number of days you will try this experiment and then re-evaluate.
  4. Bonus Step – for those who really want to make it happen, list out the name of a person, or people, you are sharing this with who you want to help you with your intentionality.


Now perhaps you are asking, “Why am I providing a question for you when we are talking about growing real connections?” Well it’s because if you want a real connection, it’s best to offer the real you! To offer the real you takes reflection and intentionality.

So if you didn’t work through the reflection and implementation steps yet, take some time today to do just that! Print out the worksheet and post it somewhere you can see it or put those action items into your phone calendar or virtual assistant to help you be the best you. Then let me know how it goes.

Next month we will jump into growing confidently connected to each other.


Next Steps:

  • Did a current conversation or a certain someone pop into mind as you read this blog?
  • Download the worksheet!
  • Which of the reflection questions were the easiest for you?
  • Share this blog with someone else


We were never designed to go through life alone, but life and adulting can make it begin to feel like that! Don’t let it stay that way! Get back to the important things of building healthy relationships and being a healthy, safe, good friend to those in your life! Together we can make a difference in bringing about healthy, safe, good growing relationships!






Liz Lawrence, MA, LPC-S is counselor, coach and creative who is passionate about people. She directs a counseling center in Austin, Texas and with husband David Lawrence co-leads the non-profit Renue.Me whose mission is to invest in the dreams of leaders in underprivileged communities around the world. Connect with her at  or


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